Social awareness vs self deprecation

On the surface these 2 things seem vastly dissimilar but hear me out.

I think of social awareness (or social intelligence) as the ability to be able to read situations and know the best course of action when in social situations. Social awareness goes hand in hand with emotional intelligence; it is the ability to be able to read between the lines and gage what is really going on.

Some of the questions you'd ask yourself are:

🧩 Is this the kind of environment I want to be in?

🧩 How can I best diffuse this situation?

🧩 What is a safe topic to switch to?

🧩 How can I best navigate this conversation so that it's productive yet straight to the point?

The thing is, people that have a knack for social awareness is that sometimes being too aware of other people's feelings can push you down the path of being a people pleaser. And sometimes in those tense situations you use yourself as the butt of the jokes to make other people laugh and feel more comfortable.

There's nothing wrong with being able to make fun of yourself, in fact I think it's healthy 🙌🏾, but I would caution against something that I have fallen victim of too many times in my life: putting yourself down to the point where it makes you uncomfortable, just to make others feel more at ease by making yourself seem 'agreeable'.

It's so deflating when you find yourself leaving certain situations (often with the same person/people) feeling like down. 😔

Social intelligence is a gift, but it is not your job to make everyone around you feel more relaxed at the expense of your self-esteem. How 'bout allowing them feel uncomfortable once in a while, it might do them some good. 💥